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The uncertainty in the UK and around future shoots is getting to me today, but I am still feeling excited to see these two faces again tomorrow, albeit being a lot more strict in how we interact with each other when shooting. Long lens, drone, and separate shoot vehicles 🚵🏻‍♀️🎥 pic.twitter.com/ur9Iw2dnJF

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Golden hour scenes down in Bosigran for this week’s shoot. Before this, I’d never been to this part of the UK. Now I’m feeling drawn back already. I can see why people come back and climb these features again and again 🌞 pic.twitter.com/PMMqZ0EN4b

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Feeling a teeny bit tired today after yesterday’s shoot. Mark managed to capture this weird angle of me jugging back up the route 🎥 🧗🏻‍♀️ 📸@_MarkBullock pic.twitter.com/xGwF1s9HgH

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Had the looongest abseil today waiting for a route to be free - Mark slacking at the bottom, @jdoylemedia setting up for a top down shot, and eventually we got shooting. Ah I love the sea 🌊 #filmmaking pic.twitter.com/ba5i4jUIGT

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Last night’s activities 🎥 🌊 pic.twitter.com/WLgHXWwvUc

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Follow @rachelsarah_m

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Rachel Sarah on Instagram

rachelsarahm

Freelance - send me a message for any enquiries 🎥
Creating videos, taking photos, + running around mountains.
Newest video ⤵️

On a daily basis I wonder what the hell I’m doin

On a daily basis I wonder what the hell I’m doing and whether I’m ‘too old’ to be starting out in this industry. Just over 2 years ago I was a marketing manager at a furniture company, 3 years ago I was unemployed, houseless, sleeping on my sister’s sofa bed. 4 years - a manager at Lush, 5 - a school principal in Thailand, 6 - fresh out of university with an English degree and a bag packed to live abroad and no real idea what I wanted to do. Not realising that cameras and climbing would come into my life at 25 years old.

It’s not old, but also it is when you compare yourselves to others who have been fit and climbed and photographed from an early age, who studied film at university.

I often feel late, panicked, out of shape. Out of my depth. Wondering if I’ll ever catch up. And I guess the answer is I won’t ever ‘catch up’ - I have to accept that this is the weird journey my life has taken me on (school PRINCIPAL?!) and that I can’t dwell on being too old or too inexperienced or unfit. I am trying not to compare, to learn as much as I can, to not beat myself up too much for not knowing things or for fucking up. Because I fuck up a lot! And I’m only at the beginning. Imagine how many fuck ups do I have ahead of me?! Loads, probably.

Hello to all my followers who feel like they’ll never ‘catch-up’ with the thing they love to do. Maybe the thing they’re hoping to turn into a career, or are currently turning into a career. There’s no catching up to do, we just have to get excited about moving forwards and doing cool shit at our own pace.

📸 @mark_bullock

Hello from the motorway services - I’m currently

“Can you just grab the other rope and throw me a

“Can you just grab the other rope and throw me an abseil so I can bail?”

I’ve never had to bail off a trad route before but today I did! It wasn’t even a particularly difficult route - a severe I thought I’d walk up but I got to a particularly uncomfortable point 2 meters from the top and instead of pushing ahead, I just decided to sit on the really lovely big ledge instead and asked for a line to get down so I can retrieve my gear. It was nice. I wasn’t massively frightened or frustrated or stressed out, just happy that I was out on the rock with friends from far away, and very aware of the fact that I don’t have back muscles or any finger strength anymore. So many moves that I used to be able to do comfortably may not be in my skill set right now. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to fail! It felt good to understand that my body needs a bit of strength work and training before I feel more comfortable on the rock again. Being at peace with knowing that the only way to improve is just to put some actual time in. Both in the gym and out on the rock. Now, to find the time?!

Wondering if anybody else who’s kinda ignored climbing and training over lockdown has had experiences like this recently? Surely it can’t just be me. I know my Instagram feed has been full of people out climbing loads but I know some of you have been as lazy/ busy as me!

📸 @michael.fleming

Last night I said goodbye to Filo, teary eyed, as

Last night I said goodbye to Filo, teary eyed, as we dropped her off at her new home, closing the door behind us as her new mum held onto her collar to stop her trying to come back with us.

She has spent almost 6 months with us this year! From being foster pup at the beginning of lockdown to “we are adopting her!” back to foster pup again - it’s been hard.

When she first arrived at ours, just over a week after coming over from Greece, she was terrified. She would cower into the hedge whenever a bus went past on walks. She wouldn’t pay us much attention. She seemed very much a ‘stray’ dog. As the months went by she dealt with the buses better and better, she learned to sit and stay and lie down and “paw!”. She cuddled up in bed with me every morning and, as I worked in my office, at around ten to four each day I’d find a little face resting on my thigh reminding me it’s tea time. It’s been really, really hard accepting that she won’t be part our lives anymore but I’m also so happy with how she has settled into her new home these last couple of weeks on little visits and trips. Her new owners are perfect for her.

Fostering probably isn’t for me, I’m too attached and, now, too busy. But I really think that if you are able to, fostering an animal is a brilliant thing to do.

P.s. #adoptdontshop 🐾

Within 5 minutes of meeting Frit and Frankie I had

Within 5 minutes of meeting Frit and Frankie I had fallen over a barbed wire fence and ripped my favourite leggings. I still wear them. They still have a hole in them.

I noticed @fritstartingat30 and her work on Twitter a few months ago, then I found her on Instagram, and sent her a barrage of voice messages. For 9 days I didn’t hear anything back and I was worried I’d come on a little strong (I do that sometimes, I am either too much or not enough).

But, day 10 came and I opened my DMs to find a barrage of voice messages back. A week later and I was pulling into Blea Tarn car park and meeting these two wonderful humans for the first time. Frit and I set up our cameras and talked filmmaking and representation, about starting our own businesses, feeling worried we weren’t physically strong enough, and more. We’ll be releasing the video soon (i.e. when I have time to edit it!).

I was so excited to find another female filmmaker in my niche who had the same values as me, and who wanted to share experiences and collaborate. So when Frit asked me to join her to make her documentary about @frankie_dewar’s cycle around the UK, I didn’t even hesitate.

After Cornwall, @jonathandoylemedia and I drove over to Brighton and helped document Frankie’s first day. It actually felt so nice not to be in charge! To be told what to shoot and just do it, and to just be part of something inspiring.

(Frankie is cycling around the UK interviewing women about their experiences in the outdoors. She hopes to document the experiences of people who don’t often have their voices heard - and that is something I’m stoked to be part of).

Jonathan ran back to the van to grab the drone and

Jonathan ran back to the van to grab the drone and his second camera to set up a time-lapse of the ridge. I ran ahead and scrambled up onto the ridge, the sky turning golden, a layer of sea fret threatening to ruin the sunset.

Jonathan joined me from the opposite sides (my way was much more sensible) and I threw the drone up into the air, and on recording realised I’d forgotten to put a memory card in!

Thank you DJI internal memory.

We stayed up there a while, potentially ruining somebody else’s photo, as they were right up at the top of the cliffs catching the sunrise too (sorry, but not also not). We hadn’t expected such a beautiful sunset when we’d rocked up at the crag to find mist and drizzle that morning.

I feel so lucky to have packed so much creativity and adventure and exploration of a new place into just a few hours.

And I. was. tired, with absolutely no idea that I wouldn’t be getting a good night’s sleep, because at midnight that night I’d be driving off in the dark mist to chase a storm after we saw flashes in the sky.

(We didn’t catch the storm at all, but we did end up sat on a random cliff, at 2am, in the dark, laughing at how stupid we were.)

📸 shot 5 @jonathandoylemedia

After my soggy fear-lead I thought I’d hand over

After my soggy fear-lead I thought I’d hand over some leading to Jonathan.

We scrambled right to the end of the crag, bodies turned, close, into the rock, as we clambered and climbed. This is some kind of approach. It feels a little more wild, closer to the crashing waves and further out from civilisation.

I actually felt a little bit of vertigo, maybe from just being a bit tired from the heaviness of the mist, my rope-pack swinging as I moved, and the excitement of the last few days.

We sat there on the ledge for some time, listening to and watching the waves. We set the audio to record some ambient sound for the film. I closed my eyes and listened.

We racked up, I talked Jonathan out of the HVS he was eyeing up (he was also out of climbing practice) and he set off on the route. He climbed out of sight. Time passed. I belayed, looking at the waves as I slowly gave him rope. And then it was my turn. The first part of the route with beautifully grippy rock and easy clambering gave way to a polished face with a stunning line of thinly stepped quartz which were the holds for your right hand. It was pretty bare and I wondered whether we were up the correct line.

As I got to the top, a little bemused at the grading, I congratulated Jonathan on such a bold lead, (and in the wet too!) We topped out to find the mist had gone and the golden hour sun lighting the top of the cliff. It was beautiful. I was so tired. But the sun was out and we were trying to decide if we had time to run back to the van for the drone and then over to Commando Ridge to get some shots for sunset…?

📸 @jonathandoylemedia and I

“Ah shit, it’s raining!” “Why did I say

“Ah shit, it’s raining!”

“Why did I say I’d lead this bit? I hate chimneys! I’m bad at chimneys!”

Naively, in the days after our shoot, @jonathandoylemedia and I thought we’d just be able to get some sunny b-roll for the short film and climb in the beautiful sunshine. Cornish weather had other plans. The mist descended and, on our first foray out, massive raindrops fell as we left the van. We backed off, and then tried again the next day.

Heavy mist. Looking down and not even being able to see the sea. I realised the last time I’d climbed was 2 months prior, on my birthday. I’ve climbed 5 times in 5 months. I am out. of. practice. Nonetheless I took first lead, breezing up Alison Rib and enjoying seconding the second pitch in my trail runners.

Then, Ledge Route. I took first and third. The first pitch took me by surprise actually, I felt pretty uncertain of my strength after so much time off. And then the chimney. I really am not good at chimneys, I always end up rotating and facing the wrong way with my rope all tangled. But it was fine, until it began raining and my jugs became slippery and the feet became glassy. It’s not a difficult climb, but it felt a little scary in the wet for an out-of-training out-of-practice me.

But I just kept thinking “you lead Corvus in the rain and the dark” in my head, and I found my nerve to get out onto the wet traverse - a beautiful bit of exposure for the end of the climb. I was glad to set up my anchor and haul Jonathan up, a teeny bit excited at that added bit of spice to the climb.

Maybe trad in the rain is just my thing?

📸 @jonathandoylemedia and I

“What do you think? Can you do it today?” It

“What do you think? Can you do it today?”

It is hot. Really hot. After topping out, Mark gives me a little frown; it’s not right. Running around Bosigran the last two days has been lovely, but tiring, and it’s all the more tiring for a climber who wants to know that the edges they are trusting are going to be grippy and reliable.

I think about all the intricacies of shooting outdoors, the reliance on the wind not being too fierce so the drone can fly, the weather not being too wet so equipment doesn’t get wrecked, having the scope not be so big that you feel overwhelmed with what you have to do, having the right equipment for that day (hello running back to the van for ropes!), and being flexible because projects like this aren’t always done shot by shot in a perfect order.

The more I delve into experiences like this the more I see how much I have to learn about all these little things - when it’s important to be rigid and when it’s time to bend to the circumstances. And being honest about my experience and skills, too. I’m not a weathered filmmaking veteran with years and years under my belt - I look to those people with awe and excitement that perhaps one day I’ll be like them, but with a spark of myself in there too. I used to be so impatient to be better and more experienced, but at the moment I’m quite happy where I am. Learning, growing, making mistakes, and meeting people who are sharing their own experiences with me.

So here’s to those who are still at the beginning of their journeys and a reminder that you don’t have to have it all figured out yet.

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